I'm Supposed to Take Her Home Now?

A Mommy's definition of HARD: A lack of describing how difficult those first few weeks postpartum are.
A Mommy's definition of TIRED: A lack of describing the pure exhaustion you feel the first few weeks postpartum.
These 2 words have absolutely no meaning to me anymore!

First week home from hospital taking a nap in her swing

While you are pregnant, you think about having your baby, what your baby will look like, and many other things. What you rarely think about, until it happens, is bringing your baby home for the first time and being without nurses and doctors to answer all of your questions. The fear that encompasses a new mom is unimaginable those first few weeks postpartum. You are constantly thinking, "Is she hungry? Is she still breathing? Is she sleeping too much? Too little? Is it too cold? Too warm? Etc..." But once you get the hang of it, a routine sets in place and things become much easier.
The first few weeks postpartum, I had many mood swings; Your hormones are soo out of balance and you can cry for any reason at all (as if you actually need a reason!). I remember rocking Michelle in her room while feeding her and just crying. Why? I don't know. I remember wanting so badly to be pregnant again. I truly missed it and I never though I would. I had constant neck pain from looking down at her and constant back pain from standing and leaning over to change her. And the headaches! Ouch! When your hormone levels are off the charts combined with no sleep whatsoever, you get the most painful headaches. And while breastfeeding, you're limited to Tylenol. I also had a clogged milk duct=low grade fever and achiness. NO FUN and super PAINFUL! I had also heard about some mom's getting spinal headaches and soreness where they'd received their epidural. I was so thankful at that point that I did not have an epidural because I don't think I could have handled much more. On top of all this, your body has just gone through labor and delivery! A huge thing! So, your body is trying to recuperate, but it is very difficult while getting no sleep!

Car ride home from hospital

Yes....I was one of those mom's the first few weeks that charted everything Michelle did. When she last ate, peed, pooped, slept. It felt like I had things a little bit under control that way. One day Mark just grabbed the chart and threw it away. I was upset at first, and then over the next few days I became much more relaxed. Doctors say your baby needs to wet their diaper 6-8 times a day while newborns (so you know they are drinking enough). I was so terrified the day Michelle only wet 5 diapers. But you know what!? Babies can pee twice in one diaper...so how did I really know? The lack of the chart was the best thing that could have happened. And the baby poo...oh-my-goodness. I can't tell you how many times I had to start laundry at 2 AM because Michelle had exploded all over her crib, clothes and me! Not funny at the time, but looking back, it is hilarious!

So, while this may be enough to make you say, "Wait, am I really ready for this?" No one is ever ready. But, the joy of having a child is the best thing in the world. While those first few weeks (or even months) may be difficult, it is truly worth it.

Daddy and Michelle first week home